Gadis

Gadis petah berkata,

Gadis banyak ragamnya,

Gadis seronok hingga alpa,

Gadis lupa dia hamba,

Gadis ada ilmu fard dalam dada,

Gadis bersuara perihal agama,

Gadis cakap tak serupa bicara,

Gadis sedar dia manusia,

Gadis pelupa hati penuh dosa,

Gadis langkahnya ada masa, tiada makna,

Gadis kurang bijaksana,

Gadis lemah tak bermaya,

Gadis lalai dengan nikmat dunia,

Gadis kurang bersyukur begitulah gamaknya,

Gadis masih berusaha sebaiknya,

Gadis tak ingin lagi leka,

Gadis ingin bangkit dari lena,

Gadis harus sedar umur tamat entah bila,

Gadis harus sedar tanggungjawab terhadap ibu bapa,

Gadis harus sedar dunia ini fana,

Gadis harus sedar dunia ini sementara,

Gadis harus sedar akhirat kekal selamanya,

Gadis harus sedar Tuhan Maha Melihat segalanya,

Gadis harus lebih bijak urus dirinya,

Gadis harus teguh imannya,

Gadis harus kuat lawan nafsunya,

Gadis harus kuat lawan bisikan syaitan durjana,

Gadis harus jadi solehah kerana Tuhannya,

Gadis terima segala teguran buatnya,

Gadis berkata “tegurlah aku wahai sahabat semua,

Gadis berkata “ingatkanlah aku masa mendahului usia,

Gadis berkata “masa takkan menunggu kita,

Gadis berkata “masa mudaku kan ditanya olehNya,

Gadis berkata “tegurlah aku jika aku lalai dan leka,

Gadis berkata “tegurlah aku, aku tidak mahu lemah sentiasa,

Gadis berkata “jiwaku ibarat kaca,

Gadis berkata “jika terjatuh meskipun sedikit kan terkesan jua,

Gadis berkata “aku perlukan sahabat yang membimbingku di jalanNya,

Gadis berkata “peganglah aku erat wahai sahabat semua,

Gadis berkata “moga Allah ampuni dosa kita,

Gadis berkata “moga Allah lindungi kita,

Gadis berkata “moga Allah anugerahkan ketenangan jiwa,

Gadis berkata “moga Allah tetapkan hati kita pada agamaNya.”

--Gadis ini namanya Raihana.

Bertilamkan Tanah, Berbumbungkan Bintang

8/11/2013

[Nota: Ini bukanlah artikel selayaknya diterbitkan dalam sebuah majalah atau surat khabar, ini hanya coretan sendiri merumuskan pelbagai situasi yang sedang kita hadapi pada zaman kini. Bahasa yang digunakan santai sahaja]

Bahagian 1

“Bila la aku nak merasa hidup senang. Bawak kereta Audi R8, ada rumah banglo, ada swimming pool Olympic size. Bila la hai! Nasib oh nasib,” rungut Arif.

“Hidup kau ok apa. Rumah teres dua tingkat, makan masih cukup, masih boleh beli yang berkualiti. Kau dapat masuk universiti, sekarang tahun kedua ijazah sarjana muda kejuruteraan lagi. Walaupun  kau takde kereta, kau ada motor. Tak susah-susah kena jalan kaki,” tegur Azam.

“Itu semua belum cukup bagi aku. Kenapa kita tak boleh nak impikan yang baik-baik? Apa salahnya aku nak jadi kaya, hidup senang. Aku tak layak kah?”

Tiada menjadi masalah kita impikan yang indah-indah, tiada menjadi masalah kita ingin memiliki kesenangan hidup, tetapi yang menjadi suatu masalah ialah sudah berapa banyak nikmat Tuhan kurniakan keatas kita, tapi kita kufuri?

Kisah Arif dan Azam ini kisah yang normal. Rata-rata manusia mengharapkan benda yang sama. Siapa tidak mahu hidup senang? Tapi sebanyak manakah kita jadi hambaNya yang sentiasa bersyukur dengan apa yang ada? Kadang-kadang kita lupa, nikmat di dunia fana ini hanya sementara, hidup di dunia bukan selamanya, dan di akhirat sana yang paling utama. Dunia ini ibarat ladang, kita bercucuk tanam, kita jaga tanaman kita dengan baik kerana mengharapkan hasil yang baik. Di akhirat lah masanya kita untuk menuai. Hasil tuaian yang baik, sudah semestinya dari usaha menjaga tanaman kita dengan baik. Tujuan manusia diciptakan hanya dua: jadi hamba kepada Allah (51: 56) dan jadi KhalifahNya    (2: 30)

Bercakap soal syukur, kita masih boleh makan dengan baik, jika tidak banyak, masih dapat sedikit. Kita masih boleh belajar, jika tidak sampai ke manara gading, masih dapat ilmu walaupun sedikit. Kita masih berkeluarga. Jika kita anak yatim piatu, kita masih dapat sokongan sahabat handai dan jiran tetangga. Masih ada yang menjaga kebajikan kita. Jika dibandingkan keadaan kita dengan saudara-saudara islam kita di luar sana, yang diperangi, yang dimusuhi, yang diseksa, yang dibunuh - adakah mereka bernasib baik seperti kita? Ujian Allah beri kepada mereka amat hebat, namun mereka tetap sabar dan tabah, terus melangkah gagah, mara kerana pegang teguh dengan janji Allah yang pasti. Saudara Islam kita di Palestin, Mesir, Syria, Iraq, Chechnya, Rohingya, Kemboja, dan lainnya, mereka hadapi tentangan, ujian dan dugaan yang pelbagai. Masih lagi kita tidak bersyukur?

Beberapa bulan yang lepas kita dikejutkan dengan berita pembunuhan menggunakan pistol merbahaya dan kes bunuh makin meningkat hari demi hari. Sekarang baru kita rasa takut, kerana senario ngeri berlaku di depan mata sendiri. Kalau dulu, kita diberitakan dengan situasi saudara-saudara islam kita disana, kita angguk memahami, hati penuh dengan rasa kasihan dan simpati tapi adakah kita benar-benar menjiwai sengsara yang mereka alami? Kita masih menyokong jenama produk yang menentang saudara-saudara islam kita, kita masih lagi rasa ralat untuk keluarkan duit buat derma, dan sekarang bila kita diuji, baru kita sedar diri. Tanda kiamat makin ketara, pembunuhan yang banyak berlaku merupakan antaranya. Rasululllah (SAW) bersabda: “Sebelum kiamat, terdapat hari-hari tertentu dimana kejahilan akan turun, ilmu diangkat dan banyak berlaku harj. Harj adalah pembunuhan beramai-ramai.” (Sahih Bukhari dan Muslim)

Kita masih lagi boleh tidur bertilamkan katil empuk dan berbumbungkan rumah yang utuh, tetapi mereka sudah lama bertilamkan tanah, berbumbungkan bintang.

Bahagian 2

Apa gunanya hidup,

Hidup takutkan manusia,

Mulut terkunci tak bersuara,

Jantung berdegup kencangnya ketara

Apa gunanya hidup,

Lupa asal dan tujuan,

Tuhan bicara dalam Quran,

Manusia lupa daratan,

Kufur nikmat mereka insan,

Jiwa resah hati bercelaru,

Iman luntur ilmu tidak diburu,

Buang jauh islam yang jitu,

Hati kekal sekeras batu,

Sampai bila kita mahu leka,

Sampai bila kita mahu lena,

Kiamat tandanya makin dekat,

Sudah cukupkah kita bertaubat?

Ruh bakal tinggalkan badan,

Hanya berguna amalan-amalan,

Hidup sia-sia tanpa bekalan,

Sudah bersediakah kita untuk bertemu Tuhan?

11.25 pm

30/10/2013

Tahun 2011, 11 Februari, umat islam terutamanya di Mesir dianugerahkan nikmat yang besar kerana turunnya pemimpin zalim dari jawatan yang tidak berhak keatasnya. Husni Mubarak, akhirnya turun daripada jawatan presiden kerana tuntutan rakyat. Pada 30 Jun 2011 pula, kita dikurniakan kemenangan besar apabila Pilihan Raya Demokratik pertama di Mesir membawa Dr. Mursi, Amir Ikhwanul Muslimin ke jawatan presiden. Sinar baru ini membangkitkan lagi semangat umat Islam di merata dunia, menjadi motivasi, untuk menentang pemimpin zalim dan mendapatkan semula hak asasi mereka yang tercabul. Namun, rampasan kuasa yang dilakukan oleh pihak tentera yang dikepalai oleh Jeneral Al-Sisi pada 3 Julai 2013 ibarat pengulangan memori yang pahit dan luka perit yang masih belum boleh diubati dirobek kembali. Dan hingga kini, bilangan rakyat yang terbunuh di Mesir kerana tindakan kejam tentera untuk membubarkan perkumpulan rakyat makin bertambah. Soal Mesir, kerajaan Arab Saudi sendiri menyokong kudeta yang berlaku keatas rakyat Islam di sana. Saya petik kata-kata Dr Maszlee Malik dalam artikelnya “Mengapa Saudi Menyokong Kudeta?” dalam majalah Al-Ustaz Isu 18, “Rampasan kuasa ini memberikan justifikasi kepada para diktator di Negara-negara teluk yang berhadapan dengan rakyat untuk mengenakan tindakan zalim ke atas rakyat sendiri seperti di UAE, Kuwait dan Bashar di Syria. Tidak hairanlah kerajaan Arab Saudi dan UAE dengan segera menghantar kawat tahniah kepada Jeneral al-Sisi atas kejayaannya menggulingkan kuasa Morsi. Malah, bantuan yang dijanjikan oleh kerajaan Arab Saudi dan UAE kepada pemerintahan pasca-kudeta secara nyata menunjukkan sokongan mereka kepada kudeta dan amaran kepada rakyat mereka sendiri untuk tidak cuba merubah kerajaan. Yang nyata, sokongan Amerika Syarikat dan Kesatuan Eropah kepada Negara-negara dictator ini mempamerkan sikap hipokrit mereka dalam isu demokrasi dan hak asasi manusia.” Dan sekarang, Presiden Mursi dipenjarakan di Bur Arab di Wilayah Iskandariah.

4 November lepas rakyat membanjiri jalan raya dihadapan Mahkamah Perundangan sebagai menyatakan sokongan kepada Mursi dan menentang perbicaraan kudeta. Sekarang, tentera As-Sisi masih rakus mencari individu-individu yang terlibat dengan demonstrasi jalanan untuk dihalakan senjata api dan membiarkan berdas-das peluru menusuk kalbu para pejuang agama ini. Apa tanggungjawab kita?

Di Syria, sejak rakyat mulai bangkit pada tahun 2011, sejak itu bilangan rakyat yang dibunuh oleh Laknatullah Bashar Al-Assad makin meningkat. Bermula dengan menyeksa kanak-kanak kecil yang tidak bersalah lagi tidak bermaya dengan mencabut kuku-kuku dan memotong tangan mereka sehingga seorang kanak-kanak terbunuh, dan sekarang diktator yang mengaku dirinya Tuhan masih kekal di posisinya sebagai presiden Syria, dan telah membunuh beratus ribu rakyat Syria termasuk wanita dan kanak-kanak. Namun kebangkitan rakyat makin utuh dan bantuan dari negara luar seperti Turki banyak membantu dari sudut aspek kebajikan pelarian rakyat Syria. Erdogan telah mengeluarkan dana yang besar bagi menampung perbelanjaan buat para pelarian Syria yang dianggarkan lebih sejuta orang selain memberikan perhatian serius terhadap pendidikan buat kanak-kanak dan remaja Syria. Pemimpin seperti Erdogan dan Mursi wajar dijadikan contoh, dan kepimpinan mereka yang berteraskan Islam begitu terserlah.

Tambahan pula, setelah Brunei mengisytiharkan perundangan Islam akan dilaksanakan mulai Oktober lepas, media massa barat terus memberitakan kepada umum bahawa Brunei “introduces tough Sharia Law”, “Brunei provides strict penalties of amputation and stoning for adulterers” dan pelbagai macam komen lagi. Apa yang “menarik” ialah mereka lebih fokuskan kepada betapa beratnya sistem hudud Islam, dan memberikan tajuk headline berkaitan dengan memotong tangan dan rejam, seperti ingin menggambarkan sistem hudud cumalah bertindak zalim. Masyarakat tidak langsung diberitakan faktor dan apa relevannya kerajaan Brunei ingin melaksanakan Hudud. Selain dari memfokuskan bahawa Islam sudah menggariskan panduan dalam menangani kes keselamatan dan meletakkan hukuman yang amat dan paling sesuai dalam mengatasi masalah sosial, pihak liberal dan sekular terus bermain kata dalam memastikan komuniti umum yang tidak cakna dan kurang berilmu untuk membantah sistem perundangan Islam ini. Amat mengkhuatirkan sekarang ialah adakah barat akan duduk diam dan membiarkan Brunei melaksanakan undang-undang Islam? Meskipun hakikatnya itu merupakan hak mereka selaku pemimpin negara, kita tahu musuh-musuh Islam tidak akan membiarkan prinsip politik Islam terlaksana dengan berjaya. Maka itu, doa harus sentiasa juga dititipkan buat Brunei, agar semuanya berjalan lancar disamping umat Islam perlu makin utuh bersatu dalam menghadapi tentangan musuh Islam. Sudah cukup tumpahan darah yang berlaku seperti di Palestin, Rohingya, Syria dan Mesir, bantuan demi bantuan wajib atas kita untuk salurkan.

Mengapakah rata-rata krisis yang berlaku melibatkan umat Islam dan agama yang murni ini sendiri? Tatkala seorang pemimpin berdiri membawa panji Islam, kan diserang wilayah pimpinan pemimpin Islam tersebut dari pelbagai penjuru.  Musuh Islam menyerang kerana Islam jauh dari Sekularisme dan Liberalisme. Mereka tahu Islam itu agama yang satu-satunya benar dan disebabkan kejahilan dan ego serta kerakusan dalam memegang kuasa dan ditenggelami dengan harta benda, mereka tekad meletakkan Islam dan umatnya sebagai “the one and only” target. Sistem politik Islam hanya “merugikan” mereka. Takkan dapat mereka mengecapi kekayaan dengan begitu mudah tanpa sistem politik yang adil dan telus. Rakyat merana dan sengsara disebabkan pemimpin zalim terus berkuasa.

Musuh – musuh Allah ini lupa, dan ibarat tidak kisah dengan bencana yang makin berleluasa. Contoh bencana di Filipina yang amat menggusarkan, taufan Haiyan telah meragut nyawa dengan anggaran mencecah 10,000. Mayat bergelimpangan, rumah dan bangunan musnah hancur berkecai. Masih lagi manusia kufur nikmat, “oblivious” dengan sekeliling dan terus hidup seperti yakin bahawa esok masih ada. Tema “YOLO” (You Only Live Once), “so live your life to the fullest according to your own way,” ibarat jadi satu slogan. Musuh Islam mengaburi mata dan merosakkan jiwa remaja dengan hiburan yang penuh leka. Mereka ingin remaja-remaja Islam terutamanya terus leka dan memastikan hati serta akal fikiran mereka rosak binasa. Sebab itu hiburan mereka penuh unsur porno selain mempromosikan diri manusia itu bukan sesiapa yang punya, boleh hidup ikut cita rasa. Gadis-gadis dijadikan simbol seks, dibogelkan dan memperagakan tubuh badan buat santapan mata pria. Mereka memastikan manusia hidup berlandaskan hawa nafsu. Mereka tahu senjata umat islam ialah doa, dan doa takkan menembusi hijab jika jiwa raga penuh dengan dosa. Ilmu tidak dapat melekat dalam hati jika jiwa bersarangkan titik titik hitam yang sukar dipadam. Wahai pemuda-pemudi Islam, bangkitlah dari lena! Ilmu masih belum penuh didada, kita masih boleh lagi membazirkan masa, mengejar cita-cita untuk menjadi kaya seperti selebriti dunia. Mengejar impian yang tiada langsung elemen-elemen hasrat untuk membantu agama. Kita seharusnya impikan kekayaan, agar kita dapat menyumbangkan harta seluruhnya untuk agama seperti ‘Uthman ibn ‘Affan. Kita impikan kecemerlangan dalam menuntut ilmu, kebijaksanaan dalam mengatur strategi agar kita dapat menyumbangkan daya intelek dan kekuatan seperti ‘Umar Al-Khattab. Kita jadikan Nabi Muhammad SAW sebagai “the one and only” ikutan. Al-Quran satu-satunya panduan. Takkan tersasar jauh kita insan jika berpegang teguh dan thabat di jalan Tuhan. Mantapkanlah ilmu dalam bab akidah, ibadah dan akhlak. Berusahalah cari ilmu dan berguru dengan ‘alim ulamak. Keadaan pemuda kita sekarang makin parah. Tak usah pandang jauh hingga ke Barat dan Timur Tengah. Di Malaysia, gejala sosial yang begitu merunsingkan begitu ketara. Kita yang sedar harus memainkan peranan, membantu saudara Islam yang telah menyimpang dari jalanNya. Bilakah kita ingin menjadi pemuda Islam yang dijanjikan?

Akhir kata, pelbagai senario dan situasi yang berlaku hingga kini semuanya bermatlamat untuk menjatuhkan Islam, cuba untuk melumpuhkan kekuatan umat Islam. Apa mereka peduli, manusia yang tidak bersalah mati terbunuh, mereka terus hidup sebagai pembunuh, lantaran itu mereka membiarkan umat manusia yang sudah bertemu Tuhan yang Esa; ‘bertilamkan tanah dan berbumbungkan bintang’.

Aku Belum Mati

Setelah sekian lama aku menyepi,

Sekarang aku kembali,

Bagaikan baru sedar dari mimpi,

Hidup aku kini,

Setiap hari punya puisi,

Puisi yang menggambarkan coretan hati,

Aku masih ada disini,

Syukur kepada Ilahi,

Aku masih berdiri,

Aku masih berlari,

-- Aku belum mati.

ps. Apakah peranan anda hari ini? Wahai muslim, muslimah sejati?

If I Could Catch Up With You

If I could catch up with you,

I would have the chance to tell you many things,

that I've been thinking all this long,

to tell you;

if I could catch up with you.

For now it's quite hard,

imagining I would be able to catch up,

it probably would become real sometime in the future,

for you are the sky,

and I'm the patch of grass,

that's how far the journey would be between us.

If I could catch up with you,

I would have the chance to tell you,

that you worth everything good in this earth.

If I could catch up with you,

I would have the chance to look at the sky,

in a closer distance.

Important and Less Important Babble

Bismillahirrahmanirraheem.

Assalamualaikum wbt. Salam 17th Ramadhan !

So this morning I decided to have a sneak peek of my blog. If you think that's a trick for bloggers to gain their viewers rate, then just don't think that way. I like to view my blog without signing in. Sometimes re-reading what you've posted would do you good, ya know, like you stumbled across some grammatical errors, then you actually laughed a bit at your own writing because you find it somehow funny, then more grammatical mistakes, yeah those kind. Unfortunately, instead of expecting to see my oh-that's-a-big-picture-for-a-header, a red background with a white pop up 'warning' sign/note/whatever you call it, greeted me. It stated something like this: "beware, malware found due to website --- that is linked to this page, and this could harm your computer." I was shocked. And a bit disturbed too. Because I had tweeted my blog link and of course I expected some people would like to click on it, and I wonder if they also being greeted the same thing. This is just an embarrassment. And how could it be less than horror to find out that your blog is like a spam, and go harm other people's laptop. 

I'm sorry. Really hope you guys didn't open my blog this morning. But I've already 'fix' that, some of the websites that I promote in my blog are spammed I guess, and I've removed them. So please, trust me on this. Insha Allah you won't find any of that kind of warning anymore. But if you do, you can always tell me. 

So the important babble ends here.

And other less important babble begins here. Hiks.

Have you ever stumbled into a different path in your life, it happens so suddenly, you never expected it nor welcome it, but then it happens; well of course your future is unpredictable, but you could expect something, right? What I mean is that you hoped for the best in your life, but otherwise occurred. Of course, you know you would be tested; trials and tribulations, you know that you'll come across all that, and most importantly, you believe, you have strong faith in His Words, he won't burden you with something you couldn't bear. (2:286) Just that, you need to be strong, in order to be able to encounter unexpected things in your life, and you need to learn to accept your fate.

Just like what I said. I need to be strong. I need to change the unexpected path into something that I would live with it happily. You can be happy, you still can be strong despite you're having other important thing going on in your life. I know I need to take this positively, and realize that He give you this kind of trial so that you will be more grateful to Him, so that you won't spend your time unnecessarily, so that you will be more responsible handling your life affairs. 

Anyway, I've decided to share with you Reflection episodes of Imam Suhaib Webb. Spend at least 10 minutes to watch one part. I'll post other parts later in other entries. This is of course, important. 

'Till then folks!

Keep Your Eyes Open

Everybody's waiting
Everybody's watching
Even when you're sleeping
Keep your eyes open

The tricky thing
Is yesterday we were just children
Playing soldiers
Just pretending
Dreaming dreams with happy endings
In backyards, winning battles with our wooden swords
But now we've stepped into a cruel world
Where everybody stands and keeps score

Keep your eyes open

Everybody's waiting for you to breakdown
Everybody's watching to see the fallout
Even when you're sleeping, sleeping
Keep your eyes open

So here you are, two steps ahead and staying on guard
Every lesson forms a new scar
They never thought you'd make it this far
But turn around , oh they've surrounded you
It's a showdown and nobody comes to save you now
But you've got something they don't
Yeah you've got something they don't
You've just gotta keep your eyes open

Everybody's waiting for you to breakdown
Everybody's watching to see the fallout
Even when you're sleeping, sleeping
Keep your eyes open

Keep your feet ready
Heartbeat steady
Keep your eyes open
Keep your aim locked
The night goes dark
Keep your eyes open


Everybody's waiting for you to breakdown
Everybody's watching to see the fallout
Even when you're sleeping, sleeping

Keep your eyes open.

- "Eyes Open", T.Swift

So I've Returned.

Bismillahirrahmanirraheem,

Assalamualaikum wbt.

I've disappeared too long I guess. Some of you could have questioned whether it's true writing is still my passion, like what I've always said in my introduction. Well, it's not true that if you've temporarily stop blogging means your passion of it started to fade away, I mean, we're talking about an era where journals are still a- I won't say ubiquitous, but still a good companion to some. I also used to say I get easily 'bored' when I started to slowly stop doing something, means I'm actually bored with it. Honestly, sadly to confess this but I was just plain lazy. Long holidays, home alone and just being a cook and cleaner do me no good. Well, not saying that helping to cook and clean the house for my family does no good to me, it helps of course, me being a 'all grown up' and I do need lots of practicing, sooner or later if I accept someone who had been accepted to take my 'hands for marriage', all of these would at least help me a bit. No, I'm saying that long holidays do me no good. I'm not productive. But then again, who am I blaming?

You see, regret and wasting time always come together. No, you waste your precious time, then you'll be regretful of it. To take care of time is something, a huge responsibility actually. To practice what you've learned is also another thing, a remarkable thing if you succeed to practice your knowledge wonderfully. What I meant is that, you know how precious time is, you've been taught about how precious it is, since pre-school, then moving on to school years you have Usrah mates or Halaqah mates, Adik-Beradik-whatever that you want to call it, and Naqibah, who never failed to especially foster Islamic teachings, not to mention you always, constantly reminded yourself that you should always be grateful, that your parents taught you well. It's not the matter of not obtaining any knowledge or teachings, what matters now is how you practice them. First thing first is time management, and you know how important it is. To your life. How you'll be questioned later by Him, what have you been doing with the time, with the free time that He gave you.

I realized that when I'm in the university, and my schedules were packed with lots of activities, here and there, I managed my time quite well, I could still ensure that my taklifat were ticked most of it, alhamdulillah, and I would say now that to compare my time being spent then and now, back then was well spent. Look at how vulnerable I am, to lots of things that weakens me more, that breaks me, and caused me to become much more fragile than ever. I realized that the free time that He gave me, I should've use it wisely. Regret. 

Over 270 bones are created beautifully by Him to enable humans to functioned well. Approximately 10,000 tonnes of wrought irons are required for the Eiffel Tower to stand firm in the heart of France. And I need friends to always, constantly remind me that this life is not forever, that it would end, sooner or later, for me to become more human; for me to become more realistic, for me to become more alive.

His beautiful Words are beyond wonderful, indeed, they're magical, but sometimes you need a friend to constantly remind you to open the Holy Book, to tadabbur, to read with much warmth and fear, 'till your cheeks are wet with tears because those Words touches the heart. Sometimes you need a friend to constantly remind you to recite the Ma'thurat daily, so that you'll be well protected by any source of evil. Sometimes you need a friend to constantly remind you to do good, and ensure that your time is always been well spent. Always, may sound too unreal, for you would do mistakes, but trying to become better; improving, may get you to 'always'. 

So I have free time. Besides, doing what I'm supposed to do , and ensuring the taklifat is well-followed, I know that I could also get 'bonus' by providing good insights for people. You know you could blog and get lots of 'rewards'. Yo know you could instagram and get lots of 'rewards'. You know you could tweet and still get lots of 'rewards'. It's just the matter of what you post in your blog, or your instagram or your twitter.

Masha Allah it's 16th of Ramadhan already. Please pray for me.

Good Night Folks!

Aku Seorang Pendosa

Ku terduduk lama,

Suasana hening di sekelilingku,

Ku mendongak ke langit,

Dan air mata mulai berlinangan di kelopak mataku.

Hatiku sebak,

Memikirkan dosa dan salah silap yang menggunung tinggi,

Memikirkan nikmat-nikmatNya yang telah kukufuri.

Aku telah melampaui batas,

Lalai dan tidak bernas,

Dalam mengurusi  masa,

Yang terasa amat laju putarannya,

Dan aku seperti ditinggalkan sendirian,

Bersama dosa-dosaku.

Aku merenung jauh,

Mengenang coretan-coretan cerita,

Yang terasa indah dalam kamus hidupku.

Terngiang-ngiang pesanan ibu bapaku,

Terpancar wajah-wajah naqibah dan ahli usrahku,

Terbayang bibir-bibir sahabat-sahabatku,

Mereka seru ayat-ayat cinta Tuhanku,

Dan mereka tidak pernah jemu,

Memimpin tanganku,

Memegang erat bahuku,

“Agar kau sentiasa berada di jalanNya Raihana,

Agar kau thabat dan istiqamah di jalanNya, Raihana.”

Kutundukkan wajahku,

Wajahku yang hina,

Menghadap Tuhan Yang Maha Esa.

Ya Tuhan,

Engkau kurniakanku ibu bapa yang menyeruku kepada agamaMu,

Engkau kurniakanku sahabat-sahabat yang mengingatiku kepadaMu,

Namun aku seperti manusia yang tidak mengenang budi,

Yang tidak tahu membalas dengan kemuliaan budi pekerti,

Aku tidak akur pada perintahMu,

Aku lalai dengan pesanan-pesanan mereka yang aku sayang,

Aku tidak menghargai nikmat-nikmat pemberianMu,

Aku manusia hina!

Aku manusia berdosa!

Ya Allah,

Masihkah ada ruang untukku?

Bulan yang amat mulia bakal tiba,

Dan jiwa ragaku masih kotor,

Jauh sekali aku mahu berada di landasan yang tidak Engkau redha

Jauh sekali aku mahu terus menerus berada dalam kelalaian

Jauh sekali aku mahu mati dalam keadaan hina dan berdosa

Ya Rahman,

Ujian dan dugaan yang Kau beri,

Jadikanlah kesemuanya seperti genggaman-genggaman tangan yang berjuta,

Yang memberikanku kesedaran disebabkan pukulan yang tak terhingga,

Amat sedih sekali nasibku,

Jika ujian dan dugaan yang besar ini masih tak mampu menyedarkanku.

Ya Allah,

Aku datang kepadaMu,

Mengharapkan rahmat kasih sayangMu,

Aku yakin,

Meskipun hatiku terlalu hitam,

Meskipun jiwaku terlalu rosak,

Dek kerana dosa dan salah silapku,

Aku yakin,

Aku masih berpeluang mendapatkan rahmatMu!

Aku yakin,

Kasih sayangMu terbentang luas seluas lautan!

Buatku.

Aku yakin Engkau masih sayang padaku.

Ampunilah aku Ya Ghofur,

Aku seorang pendosa.

A Minute From You, Means A Thousand Hours For Me

Friends,

a word in which you could think of many nicest thoughts,

a word in which you will see lying behind it,

stronger and meaningful words of;

loyalty,

kind,

respect,

honour,

keeping promises,

and much more other beautiful words,

which signifies the responsibilities,

the qualities,

needed in a Friend.

And then there is a saying goes,

“A friend in need is a friend indeed.”

And the worst part of the story of me writing all these is that,

I had neglected those responsibilities.

I disown the merits needed in a Friend.

In simpler form of words,

I am a bad friend.

I remember saying the words like,

“Let’s promise each other,

To cherish this friendship,

To still become friends,

Although we are worlds apart.”

The same ol’ same ol’ words,

That I’ve repeated ever since I went to primary school.

Ever since I made a friend,

And ever since we need to depart,

And started walking on different paths.

I remember having friends were one of the greatest things,

That has happened to my life.

They changed my perspective on certain prospect of life.

They changed my feelings from sorrow to joy.

They made me forget the pain that I have inside me.

They taught me that friendship must be cherished.

And I realized that.

I realized that when I first make friends.

The constant saying of love.

The constant saying of miss.

The constant saying of thanks.

The constant saying of sorry.

Although all the words spoken that seems decades ago doesn’t matter now,

But one thing that I hope is for

Neither any of you my friends, had the slightest thoughts,

Doubting those words that I’ve spoken before,

As if I never mean it.

When I said all those magic words,

In which it felt as if decades ago,

I did mean it.

The problem that I’m facing now is that,

I forgot how everything was special around us.

I forgot how beautiful our friendships were.

I forgot the magic words that had slipped from my lips.

I forgot, I forgot.

And I don’t blame any of you my friends,

Or do I still have the right to refer all of you as my friends?

I don’t blame any of you from being mad at me.

I don’t blame any of you from drawing away from me.

Because I caused all that to happened.

So many sorry,

So many promises made and be broken again.

So many times I have hurt all of your feelings.

So many times I repeat the same mistakes.

So many tears I caused all of you to shed.

So many memories that I could sense that,

 You wish I wasn’t part of it.

Because it will hurt you more for reminiscing those memories that we had shared.

I should have at least tried.

Although we have part our ways,

I should have at least given a call once a week.

Or text on certain days in a week.

Or email,

Or send direct messages,

Or anything,

Just to ask how have you been doing,

How is your family,

Is there any good news you would like to share,

Is there any sad news you would like to pour out.

I should have at least,

Become your ‘crying shoulder’,

If not every day like I used to be,

On certain occasions you felt sorrow I should’ve still become the crying shoulder.

In simpler words,

I should have at least acted like a Friend.

It’s probably too late to try and fix everything now.

It’s probably too broken to mend everything now.

And I realized that second chances,

 or I guess probably the hundredths times of second chances all of you had given me?

Would not be given to me anymore.

And I will put the blame on me.

On me, and not anyone else.

The memories that we have shared,

I know I couldn’t rewind them to experience them again.

I know I couldn’t make all of you laugh like I used to.

I know I couldn’t make all of you smile like I used to.

Dear Nur Aisyah,

Dear Nabihah,

Dear Anis,

Dear ‘Aisyah,

Dear Husna,

Dear Kyra,

Dear Hanani,

Dear Qila,

Dear Alia,

Dear Tera,

Dear Fatin,

Dear Kak Fatin,

Dear Aisyah,

Dear Jannah,

Dear Insyirah,

Dear Aimisya,

Dear Nalut,

Dear Unie,

Dear Fasyak,

Dear all.

I guess I still owe you all those magic words,

For I don’t know any other words that could say exactly that,

I’m sorry for everything,

For every single mistakes,

For every wound,

For every tears.

I’m sorry that I should have become a friend,

Your true friend.

I’m sorry that I never made an effort,

An impacting effort,

To become a true friend.

Nur Aisyah, Nabihah, Anis, Atikah, Syahmira, ‘Aisyah,

The memories that we have shared since we were small,

The friendship that has been created ever since,

I’m sorry for not being a good friend.

We were ‘best friends’.

But I had not been acting like one.

I hope we could still be able to communicate like we used to when we were kids.

Although 13 years have passed,

I hope we could reunite.

Thank you for being my friend, my best friend.

Thank you for all the help that you lent.

Thank you for everything.

Thank you for creating memories those were beautiful.

Husna, Kyra, Hanani, Qila, Alia, Tera, Fatin,

The beautiful memories of 3 years old,

The friendships of 7 years that we should have ever since we met,

I’m sorry for not being the best friend for all of you.

Kyra, Husna,

Both of you were among the first to know me since I first entered SB,

And the friendship we had created ever since.

With more friends that we met along the way,

Qila, Hanani, Alia, Tera.

The friendship that turns out to be pretty strong,

Back then.

I’m sorry for everything,

For every single mistake,

For not being the best friend for all of you.

Thank you for every precious moment.

Thank you for being the reason for me to laugh and smile.

Thank you for all the help that you lent.

Thank you for being my friend, my best friend.

Dear Jannah, Insyirah, Aimisya, Nalut, Unnie, Fasyak, Anis,

The memories of 2 years old,

The friendship that we should have own for 5 years,

Thank you for everything.

For the treasurable memories.

Thank you.

I’m sorry for not being a good friend and a best friend.

I’m sorry for everything, for every fault.

I’m sorry.

Dear all,

I’m sorry for every fault I had done.

I’m sorry for carelessly handled our friendship.

Thank you for still being there for me.

I know all these words don’t mean anything to heal those wounds I have caused.

I know all these words probably will raised hopes for me,

To start being a friend to you.

Probably cannot recreate the past.

But at least, sowing new memories.

Insha Allah.

I realized that enough promises been broken,

I realized that enough sins I had done towards all of you.

I realized that I should make a move.

I’m sorry if I made you feel regret of knowing me.

I’m sorry again, for everything.

I’m sorry if I should have written more.

I pray so that Allah prolong your life,

Grant all of you constant success and happiness,

In this world and the akhirah.

I pray so that He eases everything that you’re doing right now,

And protect you and your family and those precious people around you,

From any harmful things and calamity.

And I pray,

That you could accept my apologies.

I also pray,

So that I could become a person who hold tightly to her promises,

Who would bring joy and not tears to the wonderful people around her.

Yes, all of you were and still are,

 wonderful.