Tuesday, March 15, 2011

When You Thought It Is Enough But It Is Actually Isn't

Enough is enough.
You think you have done enough.
Enough in everything.
Enough in your words.
Enough in your actions.
Unfortunately, so sorry to say that,
you are wrong.
So wrong.

Let us go one by one.
Let us turn the page by page.
Let us just sit down and take time,
to think back,
to recall,
to reminisce.
Number One;
"How is my ma'thruat?"
Sadly to say that,
it has been in a comma for almost more than two months now.
Yes, now you can open your eyes big,
your mouth wide open in shock,
this is absolutely,
unexpected.

Take a deep breath,
and let's move on to Number Two.
Shall we?
Number Two;
"How is my Dhuha?"
Sadly to say that,
it is only been done 3 times when you were away for 70 days.
Yes, now you can start closing your big eyes,
your mouth now shut abrubtly,
too numb.

No my dear, this is not torture.
Really, it's for your own good.
So buck up, Number Three is coming right up.
Number Three;
"How is my qiyam?"
Sadly to say that,
it hasn't been done for three months now!
Gosh, honey!
What have you been doing?
You know that you cannot rise early if you don't sleep early.
Yes, you can fall down now.
And let the tears fall,
silently.

Sorry to let you know about all these.
But you do remember your resolutions right?
Please, if you don't, let's not be a lazy bump and click on to the January post.
There, written clearly and nicely, boldly.
It is understood that you are now,
feeling guilty.

Ya Allah,
forgive me.
I shouldn't be like this.
I shouldn't just let it all go away.
I shouldn't create excuses.
I shouldn't just pray 5 times a day and read the Quran every morning and night.
I should've done more than that.
It is not enough yet.
I've wasted a lot of my time.
A lot of precious time.
Ya Allah,
forgive me.
And no one forgive sins but You.
Allah is all Forgiving, all Merciful.

p/s: This is only the part of it. I have many things that I'd done not enough yet. Well actually, there is no 'enough' in our life. Yeah, no enough.

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